With every job when it's complete. There is a sense of bittersweet

That moment when you know the task is done
Though in your heart you'd like to stay
To help things on their way
You've always known
They must do it alone.

Mary Poppins - A SPOONFUL OF SUGAR (FINALE)

I love theatre.

I love going to the theatre.

I love seeing musicals, plays, (classical) concerts, modern dance...

I do not love opera or ballet.

I envy people who have the courage to get up on a stage and perform.

I like quite a few performers, I though adore only a few who, as I feel have something unique, something special in their performance.

I usually do not like the big names in the biz being often too slick and glib for my taste.

I do not care about a big voice or big gestures when I do not feel the performer really means it.

I have been going to the theatre since I was a little child. 

My first ever trip to a theatre was at the age of four in the city of Lübeck around Christmas time - a children version of 'The Magic Flute'; it didn't do much to me, but the year after I got to see a most wonderful production of 'The Snow Queen' - even after all these years I recall scenes from it feeling so vivid.

During my teens I mainly went to plays getting my hands on cheap tickets thanks to the city of Hamburg. 

The number of plays I saw including my first ever trips to the then rather new and exciting Schmidt Theater and the Schmidts Tivoli was rather high.

During my uni years I got more interested in concerts with Britpop being big but once I moved to Dublin and later to London after uni I was back at theatres and never really left them behind again. 

For a while I was more interested in musicals though these days I prefer plays again. 

I have seen the biz change quite a lot over the years, particularly in musical theatre in Germany. Saying that it is actually not much fun any more these days. 

Why? The number of new shows is small, the commercial theatre companies do not take much risk any more, the subsidised theatres too often show the same stuff – My Fair Lady, Rocky Horror Show, Evita.

Do not get me wrong, I do like these shows but there are just so many My Fair Lady productions I can bear to see especially when “Regietheater” takes over.

I started this blog in late 2011 feeling the need to put my passion, my love about theatre into words, also as a contrast to the usual boring "reviews" in which everything of a show is usually great.

Over the last few years the number of musical "review" websites and blogs seemed to have exploded as many fans feel obviously the urge to write the same boring reviews in which everything of a show is usually great.

Do not get me wrong. Everyone can do and write what they want as long as legal but most of these blogs bore me even if they are perfect for performers to pride themselves on these.

My posts, at least I think, were/are usually different. I tried to balance my posts, be honest and put the emphasis on backing up my opinions.

Sharing this opinion though allowed me too many glimpses into the deepest of human abysses being threatened, insulted and bitched about by some performers, who had an issue with me writing something negative about or criticising their performances (hello certain TfN and Schmidt Theater performers - now go and get a life!) and by fans, who were angry about me writing something negative about their faultless star or their faultless show including stirring up other people as that one horrible woman from Berlin - it made me stop socialising with these (mad cases of) fans being surrounded by so much negativity, nastiness and jealousy.

Yes, I also received praise how well I'd write, how well I'd research, how much I'd know in general.

But then I never started this blog for others, I did this for myself to put all this love I had for this business into words.
Somehow I though lost this drive (the lack of spare time because of new job never helped either), the urge to write it down on a public platform wanting to keep these special moments for myself though I left this blog open.
But after attending an opening night a few weeks ago overhearing a certain comment I decided to draw a line - my theatre life will stay private it not being any one's business what I do with my spare time, how often I see a show etc..
And closing this blog is part of the step back into privacy.

Thanks to everyone who followed this blog, who read the posts, who liked (whether you agreed or not) what I wrote.

Am off moving on and can be found at some German theatre even if I do not write about it any more...
Tschüs, good bye, adios, adieu, arrivederci!